The Ramblings of a Soldier’s Wife

Well hi there!

Somehow on this great big world wide web you've stumbled upon my little space where I ramble on about my life married to a soldier in the US Army. You'll find random blurbs, stories about my day, and I'm sure a rant and/or rave now and then... but it's all just my rambling, some days longer than others, so enjoy your visit while you're here.

If you're daring enough (or bored enough... LOL) to become a regular visitor, be sure and check out the "characters" link in the navigation menu so you'll know who's who in the ramblings you find here. The way I tend to go on, sometimes you might get lost if you don't know the who's who and what's what in my day to day ventures, story lines, events and bored tidbits *wink*

Regardless though, this is my writing space to share, gripe, vent, laugh, and of course, ramble. I'll obviously leave some tidbits out as times call for it for "privacy issues", but other than that, I'm an open book, and I hope my journeys will entertain you through yours.

Now onto the entries...

The Emotional Roller Coaster

May 26th, 2009

So, yes, it’s been a month since I last posted, and it’s been the usual ups and downs of emotions for me. For those of you who keep up with me on Facebook and/or MySpace, I’m sure you’ve seen the status as happy and excited one day and sad and lonely the next, but that’s been it for me over the past month.

The kids and I did get moved the beginning of this month, and I have since unpacked everything and settled in, but unfortunately Mike’s still not here joining us. His appeal hearing was a couple days before we moved. Apparently his attorney did so well on forming his case, that it caused a huge uproar in DC with his medical records, and instead of them re-evaluating him then and there based on the new test results and medical reports the attorney made available to the board, they halted everything and have decided to pull Mike from Fort Bragg, transfer him to Washington D.C., and restart the entire med-board process. At the moment he’s still at Fort Bragg… he’s STILL waiting for the orders that will send him to D.C.

Meanwhile, as each weekend approaches, we cross our fingers and pray we’ll get to see him… sometimes he manages to sneak home for a day or two, sometimes he doesn’t. We’ve been told for him to expect to be on his way to D.C. within the next week, but we’re not holding our breath, we’ve heard that before, and will believe it when we actually see it happening. As for how long he’ll be there once he does get there, that’s still unknown as well. We were told it could be a couple weeks, it could be a couple months, it could be as long as a year… and once he’s there, coming home to see us on the weekend… well, the chances will be even more slim, if likely at all.

I am so emotionally and mentally drained. The ups from the thought of getting to spend time with him, then back down when I have to watch him drive away, then back up when there’s a phone call saying he’s coming in for the day, and back down again as he pulls back out of the driveway, unknowing of when I’ll see him again and all the things going on in-between. My sleep routine is so flip-flopped and messed up going on a norm of 2-3 hours of sleep a night, so when he does get to come in for a night, I’m so exhausted and finally feel the comfort of him there that I sleep so long and so hard that I wake up more tired than I was before he got there.

To top it off, family has been a joke through it all. When Mike does finally get a chance to come in, everyone rushes over to the house to see him and encourage him and catch up with the latest… and as they leave the house they look at me and say don’t forget to give us a call if there’s ANYTHING you need help with whether it be lifting, moving, fixing… anything, you just clal us and we’ll be right there to help! Keep in mind there’s family all over the place here within a 5-10 mile radius. It amazes me though… when I do call, no one answers, no one returns my calls or messages, abnd my phone never rings. Not once has it rung, not even to check in with me… the only time it rings is if THEY need something from me, and of course I run to their aid at the drop of a hat, no questions asked. The kids and I could drop dead and no one would know it until they found out Mike was in town. Our nearest neighbor is over a quarter-mile away, and they just moved out right after we moved in, making the next nearest neighbor over a half mile away… so I could scream for help and the only response I’d get would be my own echo… so right now I’m feeling pretty used up, tired, drained, and alone.

Sigh…. I guess I’ll end the rant session, it’s not what I wanted to use my blog for… but today, it was needed, and will hopefully help having shared it, even if just by typing words onto a page.

Luv and hugs and all that mushy schtuff :)

3 HOOAHs, loud and clear!

Finally…

April 23rd, 2009

I finally got my blog back up! Not sure what happened there for awhile with the hosting, but that’s what I get for messing with the dns info :) At least I’m back up and running again before you all thought I went missing again
Okay, so, to pick up on previous posts, and bringing you current yet again…

May 1st we’re moving back home to Bland, Virginia! Now, when I say “we” I mean me and the kids. Mike won’t be joining us back at home quite yet, and there’s not an expected date yet either. As previously mentioned, Mike was to be medically discharged based on what happened to him with the “chiropractic specialist” he went to. Well, come to find out, the med-board came back to him with an offer of 20%. For those of you either in the military, or more likely military spouses, you’re probably familiar with some of what goes on at the med-board hearings. For those of you who don’t know, they basically determine what percentage of your pay you are entitled to for the disability you’ve endured. They determine that percentage based on what’s wrong, how it happened, where it happened, what steps were taken to fix it, and how it not only effects your life now, but how it will effect you in the future, not to mention what changes your life has, is or will take because of the physical disability. Saying all that…. 20% is crap.

Thirty percent or lower and you’re offered a “compensation pay” and then NO retirement pay or disability reimbursement. Mike’s compensation pay would have totaled just over $7000 after taxes. And sure, who wouldn’t like to be handed a check for $7k. Here was my views on it though… take it and shove it!! $7k wouldn’t cover even one year of insurance on Mike, his prescriptions, his physical therapy, or doctors visits much less make up for the fact that this has literally flipped our lives upside down. I broke down crying when we were called into the office to be given that figure… and the lady looked at us like she was offering him a gift when she presented the paperwork to us to review. A million things raced through my mind at once. Mike has always been the main financial provider for our family. He gave up a contracting business to join the military… one that took determination, faith and tears to get going after many financial struggles we endured… and then to know that another man made Mike his guinea pig with no reprimand for poor medical practice and Mike was going to physically pay the consequences for the rest of his life… and what that did to our plans, dreams, and goals… well, it scared the crap out of me.

After Mike’s CO found out about the “offer”, he hit the roof. He started making phone calls to those in higher command, and eventually contacted Mike insisting that he appealed the med-board’s decision. Worried that it would only cause more waiting time and problems, he hesitated… but with so many coming forth on his behalf, he agreed. So…. he will be heading to Walter Reed in D.C. very early Tuesday morning for a last briefing with his attorney, and then for the appeal hearing on Wednesday.

We’ve been told to expect excellent results based on the findings by his attorney during her preparation of the case. Apparently a few backs were covered of some guilty (non-professional) military doctors in the original med-board hearing, and through some shuffling of paperwork Mike was not shown any favor whatsoever… but it’s all coming to light now, and we are so blessed by some of the soldiers in higher command in his company. They’ve literally bent over backwards to get needed information found out and revealed. His test results had been altered, some completely left out of the original files the first med-board reviewed, inaccurate information was presented, and frankly, it was made to look like Mike, in his own decision, went to a civilian private chiropractic office for a massage and it went bad, and now was just trying to get out of the military. Wow… I was appalled when I found that out… but patience is perseverance… and I look forward to Mike being blessed for his willingness to wait this out despite the horrific pain he’s had to endure since… and will have to continue to live with.

I don’t want finances to be a burden to him. I don’t mind going out and getting a job, and I will if that’s what the need presents itself to be… but for him to be just a shuffled piece of paperwork to cover someone else’s careless mistake…. I am not okay with that.

So anywho… This week I’ll be finishing up packing. We had hoped the movers would be able to come in ad do the packing and moving for us, but with so many on this base currently PCSing, there’s a seven week waiting list, and that’s just not an option… so a DITY move it is. Once Mike is given the new decision at the appeal hearing, new orders to go home will be issued for him, and he’ll hopefully be headed our way in Virginia soon after.

Lord, these shoulders are broad… but how much more can you pack on them!? (That was NOT a challenge… just a hypothetical question!!!) Patiently waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel…..

Luv and hugs and all that mushy schtuff :)

5 HOOAHs, loud and clear!

Tinkering in PSP

March 26th, 2009

So I realized it’s been AGES (or so it seems) since I dabbled is Paint Shop Pro, so I decided to play in it a bit while Madison took her nap

I’m not sure how many of you are familiar with WhuddleWorld, but I goofed around with some ideas for item suggestions. I’m not sure what I think about them, or even if they’d be good enough for consideration, but I thought I’d share them here… a little bit of a different post from the norm here